BIKE TRIP

But first....

A story.


So my landlady called yesterday to ask if she could show the apartment to some people. I said no and that I just got back from a trip and that I needed until today. So we set it for noon today. I picked up all my crap (which always takes longer than it seems like it will) and then they came up and saw the place. The girl was kinda hot but seemed mad bitchy plus she had some big acne bumps like woah. I liked her mom better.... Pause.
Anyway, she looked around said that it was "trop mignon" (or "too cute" for all you non francophones). I tried to throw in the fact that the wifi sucked a few times which caused a little chagrin with my landlady. Whatev. Going out the door she pauses and picks a wrapper for one of these out her pocket and drops it on the floor and walks out.
I almost said "hey you dropped this," but it was after they were outside the doorframe that I realized that she had just used my floor for a trash can. Littering is lame. Especially in someone's house that you don't know. Though I was a little angry, I was more astonished by her audacity. After laughing for a few minutes I felt glad that her mother didn't see her act. Seemed like the type of mother that would let her daughter walk all over her. Lame. Slapaho!


Craig David is underrated. Although this song is a little juvenile, it's still a Jam. The beat is hot and his voice is great although it's not like he has to hit alot of notes.




Bike Trip Time...

So we left last Sunday morning to Avignon. Unfortunately, Joseph Cardinal's subconscious body felt it neccessary to not wake up to an alarm and to help me, Marc, and Joe miss the train. The tickets that we had were internet tickets. This means that we printed them out after purchasing them on the internet. The only difference between an internet ticket and a ticket that was printed out on the actual ticket stub is that you click a button to have them send the tickets to you by mail. So we couldn't switch the original ticket out for a new one and just pay a small fee. We were going to have to buy new tickets (at something like 90 euros a pop). Luckily, we came across a conductor on a later train that said "oh I have an american friend, so I can make an exception for you guys." Awesome that he would do that but dumb that we even came across a situation that dumb. Thanks to the french who would create some rule like that.

We got to Avignon in the afternoon and got into the hostel/campsite depending on who you were in the group. (Joe and I stayed in the hostel. We like being clean. Also there was only one tent.) We jurled a little around the town after my chain broke a few times and caused me to be both really bummed out and really sore from biking on marc's bike and falling due to his choice to buy a 700 wheel for his frame which supports 650's. (The wheel hits the pedal. That's not good FYI) Anyway, we saw some thangs like the pope's palace and the city. We got a ton of icecream (3 cones to be exact) and then made our way back to the hostel to rest a little before the big trip the next day.

Next day we left late (of course) to go to Aix-en-Provence. We go the first 70 km or something without too much bad happening (just brian getting two flats). We found this little town that was way up on a hill. Because it was monday most everything was closed, but the boulanger was definatelly stoked that we showed up. That was probably the most business on a single group that she had had in the last 10 years. After chillin and getting some food stuffs we went on our way to find this lake that was on the map. After thinking that it was nowhere to be found, we decided to keep going up this curvy road that crossed a large wall. Well, we're all idiots cause that was the reservoir for the dam that we were looking directly at. We chilled for a while and napped and I put sunscreen in joe's eye and Brian swam illegaly in the lake and got told off by the people who take care of the lake. Then Leo's front backpack got stolen. Rad. It was also hella dumb on the part of the theifs cause all it had was clothes. The important stuff was the stuff that was tied up with bungies (who woulda thunk that we would secure the expensive stuff). Anyway that was really annoying. After our late lunch break we continued with Leos in both bad spirits and bad physical form and kept climbing up to another small city. Once we got there we were happily suprised to find that we were about to start the decent into Aix. So we did and reached proposterous speeds doing so. I think I hit 58.9 km/h which is crazy taking into consideration the 20 pounds of stuff strapped on the back of my bike.

In Aix we found the hostel, checked in and then went into town for a pint.
The next day we went into town to check it out. It was cool. We got lunch, found a Decathalon to buy white T's and a new chain for my bike, relaxed in a park, and saw the sites. That night we got cleaned up and were thinking about heading into town but decided to just jurl at the hostel. So I went out with Joe to get food and drink and came back to the picknick table outside where everyone was hanging. I put my messenger bag down. I went back in with everyone else after a few hours. I woke up to an annoyingly loud mower outside. I started to pack up my stuff. Realized that I didn't know where was my bag was. Outside! NO! Went outside and found it in probably 20 pieces. My passport was ripped up but luckily my wallet and carte de sejour was intact. Dumb.

We left to go to Marseille (late again) and got to the hostel after having a kabab by the old port of the city. We then went carrefour to get food then came back to the hostel. The next day we got up later than normal (so like 9) and got ourselves together slowly and then set out to go to Cassis. Unfortunately, the coastal road doesn't go all the way there. So we passed some cliffs that people were jumping off and continued down the road. It wasn't more than 5 minutes later that I was rammed by a jovial not-paying-attention-to-anything Brian. He did not manage to knock me over (cause I'm raw like that) but he did manage to land on his naked back and slide for a few feet annihilating his skin. Seen by some bar owner and his friend, Brian was treated by the pharmacist down the road that was friends of theirs. After a half hour and alot of man power to try to position Brian's front wheel into a ridable form, we left and decided to scrap the trip to Cassis for the next day and go jump off some cliffs. So we did. It was awesome though I couldn't get up the courage to do a gainer. It's been a while. We came back to the hostel, went to LIDL to pick up a 5 liter keg of beer that we had earlier stashed in the back section of the frozen food shelf. We had a fun night at the hostel talking with this cool dude Anthony Orso. For those of you that know Will Sawyer, he is pretty much the same person. Same build, same haircut, same interests for the most part, and same style. It was actually really weird. He told us all about Detroit, NYC, being in architecture school, working for a designer jewler, and travelling europe by himself on a bike.

Next day, we invited Anthony to come with us to Cassis. He had said he was going there anyway and we figured that we could just ride together. So we climb this mountain and Marc and Anthony stop off at the hostel which was near the top of the mountain. I continued cause I had forgotten they were going to stop and then waited for Joe and Brian at the bottom of the hill. They showed up, told me Marc had chilled with Anthony for a few seconds and was going to meet us later. So we go get food, start to eat it and wait for Marcus. Hour 15 later he shows up and we get our beach on. That beach was the single most ridiculous assembly of fine girls I have ever seen. 90% were at least 7s. Retarded. We jurled there, Joe and Brian took skeezy photos of all the girls on the beach, then we gathered our things so we could get back into Marseille in time to make the train and hopefully see the Notre Dame de Garde. I booked it up the hill and unfortunately missed the turn off to the hostel so I didn't get to say bye to Anthony. Kinda bummed about that cause he was cool.
Oh well, we get to the top and because Joe has a flat he goes down to video us coming down the hill fast.
We make it into the city, take showers, and then head to the train station. We dismantle the bikes and get stuff ready to get on the train. I don't want to really get into it but Marc somehow misses the train and we leave without him and have to take care of his stuff when we get back to Paris.

Overall, it was a fantastic trip. Plenty of jurling, plenty of white T's, alot of FILTF, and relaxing beach time. I'm really glad with how it went.

Here's the bike route from Marseille to Cassis for Colin or whoever else rides. I enjoyed doing that in my 46-17 gear ratio of 2.7. I can't wait to build a geared bike so I can handle mountains like I handle a pint of Ben and Jerry's. Eat em up.


I was singing this song without knowing the words and without hearing it for at least a year on the bike trip. I spent about 5 minutes trying to find it and realized it was Janet sampling America. It's a great song and I think you'll like it if you don't hate Jesus.


ENJOI!!!